Funny T Shirt Sayings And Quotes

by allinspiration.com

“Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. Yes is the answer.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“War does not determine who is right – only who is left.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Children: You spend the first years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next years telling them to sit down and shut-up.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“If out of people SUFFER from diarrhea… does that mean that one enjoys it?”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

“To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.”
– Funny T-Shirt Saying

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