More Funny Life Quotes And Sayings To Tickle You

by allinspiration.com

“Life is like a piano. What you get depends on how you play it.”
– Unknown

“Life is like photography. Focus is an ingredient to have a good shot”
– Unknown

“Life is like an ocean. It can be calm and still or rough and rigid. But in the end it’s always beautiful.”
– Unknown

“Life is like a party. You invite a lot of people; some go, some join you, some laugh with you, some didn’t come. But in the end, after the fun, there would be a few who would clean up the mess with you. And most of the time, those were the uninvited ones.”
– Unknown

“Life is like a multiple choice question, sometimes the choices confuse you, not the question itself.”
– Unknown

“Life is like a roller coaster; you get jerked one way and another, and you never know what’s around the corner, but you just have to sit back to enjoy the ride.”
– Unknown

“At some point, you’ll have to realize that some people can stay in your heart, but not in your life.”
– Ashley Hodgeson

“Maybe it’s not always about trying to fix something that is broken. Maybe it’s about starting over and creating something better.”
– Unknown

“Don’t tie your heart to a person that has nothing left to offer you. Let it go. It might hurt for a while, but when you get over it, you’ll see that it’s better.”
– Unknown

“Don’t stumble over something behind you.”
– Unknown

“Sometimes you just outgrow certain people. Don’t try to fix or repair it, just accept it and move on.”
– Unknown

“Forgiving you is my gift to you. Moving on is my gift to myself.”
– Unknown

“Some things are hard to let go of, I get that. But what’s the point of holding onto something that’s already let go of you?”
– Unknown

“Girls have an unfair advantage over men: If they can’t get what they want by being smart, they can get it by being dumb.”
– Yul Byrnner

“We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like?”
– Jean Cocturan

“I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbor said ‘Are you going to help?’ I said, ‘No, Six should be enough.”
– Lee Dawson

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir … mighty scarce.”
– Mark Twain

“People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven’t what they want that they don’t want it.”
– Ogden Nash

“I didn’t fall. The floor just needed a hug.”
– Unknown

“Everybody lies, but it doesn’t matter since nobody listens.”
– Unknown

“To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first. And, whatever you hit, call it the target.”
– Ashleigh Brilliant

“You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the hell she is.”
– Ellen Degeneres

“They’ve finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.”
– Milton Berle

“Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.”
– Jim Davis

“A young man fills out an application for a job and does well until he gets to the last question, “Who Should we notify in case of an accident?” He mulls it over and then writes, “Anybody in sight!”
– Milton Berle

“Graduation Speech: I’d like to thank the internet, Google, Wikipedia, Microsoft Word, and Copy & Paste.”
– Unknown

“It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose.”
– Steven Weinberg

“A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch.”
– Anonymous

“If things get any worse, I’ll have to ask you to stop helping me.”
– Unknown

“Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
– Winston Chuchill

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