More Funny Retirement Sayings And Quotations

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More Funny Retirement Sayings And Quotations


“Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them.”
– Ogden Nash

“O, blest retirement! friend to life‘s decline -How blest is he who crowns, in shades like these, A youth of labor with an age of ease!”
– Oliver Goldsmith

Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing.”
– Oliver Wendell Holmes

“My retirement plan is to find a shopping cart with good snow tires.”
– Patty Doyle

“Retiring is just practicing up to be dead. That doesn’t take any practice.”
– Paul Harvey

“The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing. ”
– Phyllis Diller

“Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering. ”
– Pooh’s Little Instruction Book

“When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.”
– R.C. Sherriff

“I’m moving on. I should have made that clear when I made the announcement. I guess I wasn’t clear. If people think you’re leaving a show after all these years, you might be retiring. So I understand where they’re coming from, but I should have impressed the fact that I hope I’m just moving on right now.”
– Regis Philbin

“Retired is being twice tired, I’ve thought First tired of working, Then tired of not.”
– Richard Armour

“I haven’t had the time to say, ‘I’m retiring.’ But baseball says, ‘You’re retired.’”
– Rickey Henderson

“I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.”
– Rita Rudner

“Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did. ”
– Robert Benchley

“Retirement is having nothing to do and someone always keeping you from it. ”
– Robert Brault

“There are days in retirement that are the waking equivalent of a dreamless sleep, if you know what I mean. ”
– Robert Brault

“The afternoon knows what the morning never suspected.”
– Robert Frost

“There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. ”
– Robert Half

“Don’t think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Let him come out as I do, and bark.”
– Samuel Johnson

“It is better to live rich than to die rich.”
– Samuel Johnson

“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you was?”
– Satchel Paige

“It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.”
– Scott Elledge

“Retirement without the love of letters is a living burial.”
– Seneca

“Retiring was scary and it was tough to give up gymnastics, but so many great opportunities have come from it that I never expected.”
– Shawn Johnson

“Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap.”
– Simone De Beauvoir

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”
– Sophia Loren

“People think retiring is fun. Well, maybe, but if you have a certain kind of fire inside, there is no end in sight.”
– Sylvester Stallone

“There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won’t cure, but I don’t know many of them. ”
– Sylvia Plath

“Like life, retirement can be full of surprises. Take when you retire, for example.”
– Talbot Boggs

“When I was younger, I thought about retiring.”
– Tanya Tucker

“You can be young without money but you can’t be old without it.”
– Tennessee Williams

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